They said it

Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it
Seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an
Hour, and it seems like a minute. THAT'S
Relativity.
- Albert Einstein
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The brain is a wonderful organ. It starts working
The moment you get up in the morning and does not
Stop until you get into the office.
- Robert Frost
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The trouble with being punctual is that nobody's
There to appreciate it.
- Franklin P. Jones
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We must believe in luck. For how else can we explain
The success of those we don't like?
- Jean Cocturan
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It matters not whether you win or lose; what
Matters is whether I win or lose.
- Darrin Weinberg
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Life is pleasant.
Death is peaceful.
It's the transition that's troublesome.
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Help a man when he is in trouble and he will
Remember you when he is
In trouble again.
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Complex problems have simple, easy to understand
Wrong answers.
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It is not exactly cheating, I prefer to consider it
Creative problem solving.
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Whoever said money can't buy happiness, didn't know
Where to shop.
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Alcohol doesn't solve any problems, but then again,
Neither does milk.
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Most people are only alive because it is illegal to
Shoot them.
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Forgive your enemies but remember their names.
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The number of people watching you is directly
Proportional to the stupidity of your action.